the-internet-vagabond-dot-com/_posts/2020-10-23-gnome-cleric-wizard.md

---
     tabtitle: "Character Write-up: Dabbledop Humblebumple"
     title: "Character Write-up: Dabbledop Humblebumple"
     topics: [gaming, writing]
     pub: "2020-10-23"
     short_desc: "The backstory of a Gnome cleric/wizard I played for a single
     session!"
---

Gnomes are interesting. I can't help but play them as small frantic stressballs.
Like hobbits from _Lord of the Rings_, dialed up to 11, minus the extra
breakfasts, and plus ceaseless banter. Gnomes are fun. This write up was for a
character for the same campaign as [Halvar](/2018/01/27/halvar.html), when he had
to step away for a bit.

## Backstory

Nothing is more tiresome than midweek afternoon service. All the candles, and
the verses, and the never-ending procession. Odin’s great and all, but I don’t
think he cares about this. Of course, I mention that one time to the head priest
and it’s latrine duty for the week! I guess now it doesn’t matter. All these
acolyte duties were from many years ago. It was pure fate, the day my current
teacher Maell’ezharon wandered into our village. He needed certain gemstones,
which my family was renowned for, and which I was responsible for that day. I
just happened to bring exactly the number he needed with me to the church that
day. That’s a habit I have. The priests say I’m “blessed by foresight.”

Anyway, Maell’ezharon wanders in, and finds me, and I tell him I know he’s
looking for these gemstones, and he’s a bit surprised, but mentions that he
hadn’t had his serious anti-divination protections up, since he figured no one
would care. I told him I didn’t know what that meant. The priest chimed in that
I was blessed by foresight. Maell’ezharon said that was shit. I was blown away.
The priest huffed and wandered off, and I just stared at this elf who seemed
completely unphased by an ability the priests couldn’t stop fawning over me for.
So I push him a bit on it, and he says that divination is mighty common, and
that if I wanted to learn more he could teach me, and he’d be willing to give me
a discount on his services if I gave him a discount on the gems!

And man temples are booooring! So yeah, I just packed up some stuff and told the
priests I had to go because “foresight told me I had to!” and caught up with
Maell’ezharon and off we went! I brought some extra gems, and a few extra
sandwiches (which he seemed off-put by, which I account to his dainty elf ways,
which meant more for me!).

For the most part, it was kind of boring - but not as boring as the temple!
Nothing is as boring as that. Trust me. Just routine travel along “safe and
well-known roads” (says Maell’ezharon) to “respectable and trustworthy
merchants” (says Maell’ezharon) for “law-abiding and fair trade deals.” (says
Maell’ezharon). I was a bit surprised to find myself still saying a prayer here
and there but old habits die hard. The more we travelled, the more Maell’ezharon
would teach me. First he helped me refine my portent abilities, and got me a
spellbook, and let me copy some of his spells into it. Then, in each town we
went to, we would combine our powers to get the best deals possible. I would
call upon my divine powers to aid him, and he would wheel-and-deal his way
through trade deals and contracts. He insisted, time and again, that we do
things “legally and fair” (his words) which was fine by me.

Then, the event happened. And magic suddenly left, and Maell’ezharon… did not
take that well. I should say, this was probably 5 or so years into his
mentorship. He had taught me many things, and I was developing into “quite the
capable wizard, if I do say so myself” (Maell’ezharon said that). We had
travelled all over the place, and eventually Maell’ezharon decided he’d like to
“invest in real estate since it’s like free money” so he bought a tower and did
the whole typical wizard thing: magic plants, and a few animated objects as
guards, and what not. I helped with that too, which was really fun. Anyway when
the event happened, we were trading and suddenly I just felt this… emptiness.
Like, a part of my body was suddenly missing. I looked at Maell’ezharon and he
was pale as bone. He just stared at his hands, then looked at the merchant and
told him he had to go, and he just left. He didn’t even get his things, he just
stumbled out of the shop. I grabbed anything that was ours, and walked outside
and saw him just standing there, waving his arms and trying to say the words,
and his eyes were a bit crazy-like, and he was sweating. After about 20 minutes,
he just sat down and stared. It took me almost 4 hours to finally get him up and
to an inn. The next day we went back to the tower, and it was really quite a sad
sight. The plants had all died (and not because I forgot to water them I always
watered them I am responsible), the guards were piles of rubble. I helped him
in, to his room, to his favorite chair, where he just slumped down and stared
into the empty, cold fireplace. For a few weeks I tended to him, making sure he
at least ate. And I kept up the place, cleaning as best I could. But after a
while, I started worrying about my family, and so I hired a local farm boy to
take care of Maell’ezharon while I was gone (feed him twice a day, make sure he
uses the loo, and don’t let him hurt himself).